Saturday/Sat - Thurs in review

+.6 on Saturday. An fml. Did SFT for the week, and probably would have lost, but TOM came for the 2nd time this month. (Started BC for my PCOS, and I am all SORTS of messed up).

Then, I was going to do a second week of SFT. Then, brother & I took mom to lunch @ Legal Seafoods for Mother's Day. After the end of the day, I looked at my day on SFT vs P+, and I had NO WPA left on SFT, but did pretty well with P+. I stayed on P+ for the week.

I have a sinus infection. I haven't been able to run or workout all week long. I feel like crap.

Yesterday, I went into the red 30P+. It made me feel like crap. It was after my midweek peek, which said I was up 3 LBS.

There's NO WAY.

I'm still feeling defeated - and I felt SO good when I was being OP. At least I have tracked everything. The emotional stress of my job is causing me to stress eat. It's making me feel worthless. The lack of working out doesn't help. SIGH.

I've been crying for the past two hours...if you're in for a long read, here it is (from WW boards):

As some of you may know, I'm a teacher at a private school whose contract was not renewed for Fall. (read here at http://tinyurl.com/4x97576 for details).

Short version: It was unfounded, a shock to me, and I got my letter one month earlier than other teachers (none of whom were let go, our staff is 15 people). I was NOT excessed. It was personal (for what, I don't know).

Since April 15, every day going to work has been a battle. My bosses are mental terrorists who are very verbally abusive. I have about 5 parents of my 25 students who are "out to get me" bc the principals never told the parents they weren't getting last year's teacher, Ms. C. With 17 school days till graduation, they are spreading rumors and not listening to answers I give them about graduation. They are choosing a break in communication, and constantly going over my head.

I was going to work every day for my 25 children.

These last two weeks, my 25 children have chosen to be rude, disrespectful, and talk over me. I refuse to yell anymore, and sending kids to the principal is not an option. My assistant is also at a loss. There are no more consequences for negative behavior (thanks to my principals) and with my REALLY rough group, the two positive behavior support systems I have aren't enough.

My anxiety going to work every day is astounding. I come home exhausted, frustrated, and upset. I left the building crying today. I feel so worthless.

I have a ton of extracurricular events coming up in the next few weeks - adding insult to injury.

I just feel like, if the kids aren't in it anymore, how can I get motivated to get out of bed for work in the morning?


I should add, after the kids finish, I have another 6 days of work, wherein I will be expected to cover classes for my colleagues.

I'm going to miss my children at the end of things, and my students in the musical that I choreographed for them (for free).

I need medical benefits, and I am just so scared and so stressed every day. It's making my WLJ SO SO hard.

Holycrap.

I've been sick so I haven't posted. Hopefully tonight after dinner.

I just made a huge mistake:

I saw Pioneer Woman's blog for the first time.

:::foodgasm:::

Went all of the way to the beach yesterday...

(ok, so it's only about 10 miles away...)

And realized they charge for parking on the weekend. $8. I had no cash. WASTE of gas money.

I guess it's good though, bc I still have hip pain, and today I am choosing NOT to run through it.

I'm kind of annoyed - it's been a week since I ran.

2nd chiropractic appointment this week to "fix" me, then I'll run again.....

::AP FAIL::

One of the 8 million reasons I love my leader...

I posted about finishing my first 10K last week. Marianne gave me THIS today at my meeting:

Cool. :) I'm very motivated by tokens. They're already on my 10% keychain. 

I was down .1, which is nominal, but considering I was a PMS Monster ALL week, and had about 5 beers last night, as well as guac and tortilla chips. Not to say it was a "Last Supper" by any means, but today is OFFICIALLY Day 1 of SFT, and OFFICIALLY Day 1 of a new cycle of OP 2 Overcome.

Today is also my first day of running again, since the 10K. I'm planning on driving to the beach to run the boardwalk, bc it is GORGEOUS out today. I've never done this before, so why not start now? I just hope the weather holds out. I plan to go around 1 (to give me enough time to digest) - and it's supposed to rain later.

We shall see.

Switching to SFT....

And this was my dinner tonight...The only thing that was NOT a power-food was my Lite Sour Cream...but it was measured and counted.

I'm still expecting a gain on Saturday, but going full-fledged SFT after that. Tomorrow is an SFT day, as well.

I'm going to learn to find "hungry" and "satisfied."

Recipe will follow another day, but...It was Pan-Seared Chipotle-Lime Chicken with Rice, Stewed Tomatoes & Beans.

A happy accident. :) I love that I can throw things together in a pinch!